Self-nurturing is easier if we have a history of being nurtured by our own parents. If not, we are more challenged. Religious folks can use the power of prayer to access and bathe in God’s love. Others require more evidence for their beliefs. In the absence of faith in the love of an invisible God, a secular approach to self-soothing is required. If we have a history of abuse, rejection, or other experiences that have led us to internalize negativity, resulting in rejection of our self, self-nurturance is a bigger challenge. The inner-child approach is one route through this dark forest. By tapping our capacity to nurture those we love, particularly our own children, we can access our nurturance skills and apply them to our self, developing self-compassion.

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